Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Waiting for the abattoir..

The above line is from one of my favorite movies "Sideways" in which the hero is having a pity party because nothing is going right and noone understands him. He is bright but it just distances him from everyone else and he is thinking that maybe life is just waiting for the abattoir (slaughterhouse). Of course his friend has no idea what he is saying most of the time but has plenty of solutions for his funk.

So nights are the worst where I wake up and think. Sometimes I read instead. I've been going through Chicken Soup for the Cancer Patient. 100+ little vignettes that all go like this: person gets cancer with a very poor prognosis and feels sorry for themselves and makes themselves more miserable. At some point, the patient figures out he has to stop and smell the roses and decides to make his remaining last 6 months the best. While he is enjoying life, somehow the cancer just mysteriously disappears. How uplifting!

But as usual, I am missing the point and getting another message. I was always missing the point of Biblical Parables. My favorite was that of the ten brides: 5 were wise and 5 were foolish. They were all waiting for the groom (only one groom for the ten of them-so much for the one man/one woman "Christian" ideal) and it wasn't clear when he was going to show up (?). So the foolish ones burned through their oil and begged in vain for the wise ones to share theirs. The wise ones were ready for the groom and the foolish SOL, which I guess meant-no nookie tonight. The point is that you always have to be ready for the Lord as you 'know not the hour he cometh.' But I thought that those wise ones were supposed to be sharing and their selfish behavior was being rewarded. In Strasbourg, the main portal to the Cathedral has the whole story carved into its red sandstone. Not only were the 5 foolish, they were ugly too and not smiling.

J&J made it safely to Maryland and are skiing today. It will be 50 deg there tomorrow. Shanna and Oliver will come here soon. I don't feel too bad, just a little queasy. I still have hair flying out all over.


Anonymous said...

Hi Sue,
I think of you often and send good thoughts your way during this difficult (read: shitty) time. I hope you enjoy your loved ones this Christmas.

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