Chemo dreams

The picture Naomi got yesterday. Note the bruises though her make-up covers her black eye. Her teammate Jasmine did her hair. For some reason, her shorts are 2XL-should fit a 250 lb man. Despite all the pins, they still fall down.

Naomi is not a happy camper. She's injured, has bad cramps, and her boyfriend left her. The last 2 events I am relieved about. Not that I get any joy out of her moaning around-though motrin should take care of that but it means another month of not being pregnant (though she insists she does nothing that would make her that way-EVER) The boyfriend sounded more trouble than he's worth, which isn't much. But he'll probably be back after X-mas is gone so he doesn't have to buy a present. Her back hurts but after today, they have a break until New Year's Eve. And today, it's just a team holiday lunch.

So I have strange dreams. I flit in and out of character. Last night I was in and out of a murderer's mind. At one point, I was the murderer, which is how I knew who his next victim would be, which would be me. My only defense was to scream like mad and flail around when he made his move, which I did waking Steve up. I didn't want to go to sleep in case he was successful in his next attempt.

And chemo hair. Somehow my formerly soft, silky hair has taken the texture of steel wool. The remaining strands irritate my scalp, which is now quite visible. I wear a cap to contain the falling strands but still some escape, to get in my eyes and food. I had to cut more off yesterday as it now tangles even though it was only 2 inches long-my real hair rarely tangles. But I am still not shaving it-I think it would hurt my scalp. Suffice it to say, looking in the mirror is just so depressing.

The news from Cancerworld: Lance Armstrong has fathered a baby naturally. The day before he was to start chemo, it was pointed out to him that he probably would never be able to father a child unless he start banking sperm NOW. He went into great detail in his autobiography how difficult that experience was-he really was not in the mood. And when he finally was able to produce something, they said something about low quantity and quality. And his wife had to go through hell for the in vitro fertilization, which eventually resulted in 3 kids. But apparently his remaining boy has made a comeback though the mom must be his hundredth woman since the first wife. Well good for him.

Shanna and Oliver finally came over, which was good but she seemed sad. They will stop by today at some point but won't stay with us until late X-mas night. Brenda will stop by too and later maybe Jan.