Saturday, December 13, 2008

Happy Anniversary!

Sharing our first drink as a married couple

Steve and me 31 years ago. The colors have faded badly
Thirty one years ago today, Steve and I were married at the Zal Graz Grotto Club, a Shriner's hall by the Rev. Wintermeyer, a minister of the Re-organized Church of the Latter Day Saints. No we are not Mormons, not even 're-organized ones'. For several years, I had run the physical chemistry lab of my beloved professor Dr. Brockway. He had done so much for me. I knew he had been a minister at one time so I had asked him to marry us. His license was lapsed but he said his friend would do it.
So this was not a fancy wedding by any means. I catered it myself with some help from my mom and my step-grandmother Jeannette. Jan did the flowers: I did the decorations. The ceremony started with my grandfather wolf -whistling to get people's attention. No attendants or procession. This was in sharp contrast to that of our childrens' weddings or even my parent's. My dad did get a band and was the photographer. We had around a hundred people there. A few days later, we had a reception in New York for Steve's many relatives that was much fancier. We went camping in the Keys for a honeymoon. We found out that it is impossible to stake a tent on a coral atoll and had to share tent space with huge lumps of coral to hold the tent down through the windstorms we endured there. Later, in Tampa, we had the biggest fight of our marrriage precipitated by Steve smashing my car (it was still driveable) into the rear end of a car that stopped on a dime at a yellow light. Steve, as a New Yorker, reads yellow lights differently. After listening to about 5 minutes of my harping, he pulled into a working class neighborhood and without a word, got out of the car and walked away. I assumed he was just going to cool off for a few minutes and come back but after an hour, that didn't look likely. Steve, bless him, has no sense of direction. Kathy the other day was talking about 'skills' ala Napolean Dynamite. I have map skills. Maps are etched onto my brain. I almost always know what direction I am heading. I can draw you crude maps of almost any city I've spent time in complete with elevation changes if I've been running or biking there. I know this isn't much but it's what I have. Steve can get lost in Ann Arbor so a large, strange city presented him some challenges. I also knew he didn't have much cash on hand. I had all the traveler's checks inconveniently made out to him only. It wasn't long before the local kids wondered why I was parked there and began to pelt the car with oranges. I was hesitant to move just in case he came back but after a while I knew that wasn't going to happen. My marriage was only a week old but already was over. I was having quite the pity party and cried my eyes out. After a few hours, I drove back to where we were staying-about 10 miles away and he was there. With a the few dollars he had, he bought a map and got a cab and told the cabbie to drive him as far as the few bucks left he had would get him which was five miles. He walked the remaining 5 miles.
We worked things out. We've gone through alot: 3 kids, various illnessess and deaths. I've always felt that I've gotten so much more out of this marriage than Steve has. I am not the easiest person to put up with but he has. I love him dearly. Happy Anniversary my love!!!

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