Monday, August 30, 2010

Chemistry dream

 I've had many strange dreams lately. One in which I was home standing up giving birth to a baby and then thinking that I better be in the hospital to give birth to the placenta because I could bleed out ( I hemorrhaged with Shanna). Steve would only agree to drive me part way so I fretted that it would fall out while I walked the rest of the way. I was mad that he was so unhelpful. Can't remember what happened to the baby.

But another dream was about chemistry. I had gone back to work and my boss (who just happens to be dead now)gave me an important project involving expensive intermediates. He told me there was no need to do small scale runs (to see if things actually worked), just scale it up. I ran the reaction overnight in ethanol but I was afraid to run water through the condensers lest the hoses pop off and flood the place. Then I worried that all the ethanol would evaporate away destroying my product. Yes DreamSue, that would happen.

It wasn't clear how old I was in each dream but I think I rarely dream about things happening now. I'm back in college alot or single.

As for my deceased boss, his name was Steve and he was married to another chemist named Sue so lots of confusion all around. I did like him alot although I had trouble understanding him as he mumbled, spoke with a New Zealand accent, spoke very quietly, and often didn't look at whom he was speaking to. Finally I just told him to write down what he wanted from me as I really couldn't understand him.

Twelve years ago, I met up with him and another friend who were at a Neuroscience meeting in San Diego. I was visiting my brother at the time. I picked them up and showed them the sights. We then went sailing in Mission Bay under less than ideal wind conditions. But as a Kiwi, he was an excellent sailor and made it work. The three of us had a great time, a beautiful fall day knowing full well that back in Michigan, the weather was cold and nasty. My friends asked me what I was going to do after I dropped them off. Oh see a really good college friend that lives here now. Upon deducing that the friend was a man, Steve (boss, Kiwi Steve) asked wouldn't Steve (husband Steve) object to me spending the evening with another man? I said something about if he had thought about it, he'd be more likely to object to me spending the afternoon with two heterosexual men, albeit married, than my gay friend. I hadn't seen this man in about 8 years. In college, he was so, so handsome (but so , so gay). I remember being shocked at how old he looked but geez, had I looked in the mirror lately? But as in my dreams, my self image is much younger and thinner. That's why I hate photos. Please don't hit me with reality..I prefer my delusional world.

Less than a year later, I was returning from some errand to find our mutual boss in my office. He told me that he had bad news, Steve (my husband) was dead. I told him that was especially shocking as I had done the errand with my husband just a minute before. Oh no, he's sorry...he meant Steve My Boss.
He was back in New Zealand with his family. His three kids were with him at the beach. His 8 year old son was having trouble in the water so he jumped in to help. He must have got caught up in a rip current. Now when you get caught in one, you have to not panic, just wait it out and eventually you'd be released. He must have known that living there most of his life but as his kid was struggling, he couldn't wait it out. It's not clear if his panicking caused him to drown or if he had a heart attack set off by all the adrenaline. His eleven year old daughter saved the boy. His other daughter watched in horror on the shore. He was only 43.

A lazy hot day here and it will be hot for the next 2 days. I need to research several subjects.

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