Sunday, June 12, 2011

One step forward; three steps backward

Dear Readers, I had been so good all week with my Project Downsize. No alcohol except for the gin and tonic with my friend, no noshing between meals, all low fat food in half portions. Yes I went to bed hungry but I assumed my stomach would shrink and life would be easier eventually. But last night I went to Steve's workplace party and all hell broke lose. For starters, these people are hobby oenophiles and had all sorts of exotic wines open for tasting. Then an Indian co-worker brought in Indian tasty appetizers and then there was bbq'd filet mignon and some elaborate chocolate concoction. Perhaps if I had left the wine(s) alone...

It was a nice cool summer night and I spent a good portion of the time swinging on a comfy patio swing. The ex-employees I knew did not come. For all anyone knew, I was just a spouse and as such I was somewhat ignored. Later though the talk became technical and I said something betraying my chemical background and someone said, Wait you're a chemist? I was included more from then on. It was fun (the wine helped) interacting with people I had never met before. I probably can not remember more than half of their names. Steve is so quiet; they were surprised that I am not.

A couple about Shanna's age brought their son, whose birthday is exactly one month before Maya's. So this little dumpling is being raised by very educated, mature, attentive adults. No one would ever question how he is being raised. He was very cute and reminded me very much of my grandson Daniel though he lacked the curls. His skill set is similar. I've had 3  one year olds, all quite different from each other, and the 2 grandsons. I do have some experience with one year old babies and I really do not think Maya is deficient although the state nurse apparently does. Maya will be tested yet again tomorrow but this time I will be there. Anyway, Maya is being measured against other one year olds and here was one right before me, a product of  presumed ideal parenting. How does she measure up versus this kid? Well Baby P can not pull himself up yet. He will walk if you hold his hands. If you let go, he will fall. Maya had similar gross motor skills when she was 9 months old. Advantage Maya though her gross motor skills aren't in question. Baby P can clap and point though he learned both skills within the last 2 weeks. Like Maya, he is not afraid of strangers; she was downgraded for this as it presumes she can't tell the difference between her mom and others. Baby P can say Mama though not on command. So Baby P has greater communication skills all acquired very recently. I didn't have the opportunity to test his fine motor skills. Maya can pick up fine grains of rice but doesn't have the proper form. She does not draw with a crayon (she will eat it) or throw a ball (again, she will try to eat the ball). She is alert and social. She will try to sing if you do and shake her hips to the music. She will raise her arms if she wants to be picked up. She does not babble in the stereotypical way but does vocalize..lots of screeching and cooing and humming. Hearing is not an issue as she does pick up very subtle sounds.

I don't know what babies the nurse is used to in that Maya seems so much behind them. Maya has been to the doctor's recently during her skinniness scare and the doctor though she was normal in all other respects than the thinness, which no longer is a concern. What are the chances of two tall thin people having a tall thin baby? Tomorrow will be interesting.

It is still cool, great for running..not so inviting for enjoying the sun. Josh and Julia came over while Maya and Naomi were over. They seem fond of Maya..wouldn't they want one of their own? I wouldn't ask...

1 comment:

Teri Bernstein said...

Mothers and babies are held to such high standards these days. Our daughter #2 didn't say ANYTHING till she was about 15 months--and saying anything around strangers was unthinkable. Even though her older sister was quite the talkative one, we never had her tested or anything because it was clear she understood a lot. Everyone is so different! It makes me sad to hear that everyone is being "tested."


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