The last woman sitting

Today was a day I dreaded for months, my mammogram and follow up. For one thing, my bad insurance will not cover any of it. Screening mammograms yes; diagnostic ones no. If you have a medical condition, nothing will be paid until you reach a high deductable so every repeat scan costs me several hundred a pop. Yes I better hold still. Last year's scan revealed that I have a large seroma around the area of my incision that looks identical on the mammogram to a tumor, a large white spot. But by ultrasound, it is not a tumor. As long as this thing exists, all my mammograms will be the expensive diagnostic one with plenty of repeats. This time I begged the technician to let me look at this year's scan versus last year's; they looked identical so that's good. But still I had to wait and wait with everyone leaving before me despite coming after me to get that all clear. I took my pulse: near 90. Later, after I got the all clear, it was down to 60. I could hear my heart pounding and felt sick. As time goes on, I am at less of a risk for a recurrence but lightning can strike twice. So finally I was given the all clear without any additional scans or the ultrasound. I then saw my onc, nothing to report there. I did talk her into having one of my follow-ups be replaced by my primary (free to me).