Friday, September 21, 2012

Role models

I don't know why I bother to read the on-line version of what now passes as a newspaper for our town. It will report some sad story and right in the middle of the text, here will be an up-beat ad placement. The big story today is whether an EMU professor kicked a sleeping student or not. The professor claims to have only spoke extra loud as he trolled the aisles lecturing and the student woke up startled. The student ran to some advisor who urged him to file a police report. He later decided not to press charges as there were no witnesses to the kick ( in a crowded classroom). But too late, the news got a hold of it. So any time there is any kind of story, the readers are encouraged to comment. Most did agreed that the student was out of line for sleeping but then some thought it was the professor's fault for being boring.

They also reported a fight between two teen-age moms. Someone commented that these moms were not good role models for their own children but then again, the commentator speculated, they must not have had good role models themselves or they would not have become teen age moms. This kind of thinking drives me crazy. I know that some people do think that if I were a better mom, Naomi would not have become pregnant. I did restrict her activities while she was in high school, but once she was legally an adult, there wasn't much I could do. I lectured about and provided birth control. Since she was young and low income, a public health nurse visited her while she was pregnant and for the first year of Maya's life. I was there at the first meeting. The nurse turned to me and asked if I had been a teenage mom too? Should I've been flattered? Do I look like I am still in my 30s? Or maybe the nurse thought I had a whole series of babies. I replied somewhat icily that I was in my late 30s when I had Naomi. I wanted to but did not point out, that I had been a well compensated, educated professional until recently, that I have authored articles, have patents, did well in school, coached sports teams, been a girl school leader, gave science demonstrations and lectures to schools, etc. I think at this meeting, I was fairly well dressed and groomed but since I had a daughter who was a teenage mom, I must be an incompetent mother.

So that put me in a bad mood. And then...a loser again in the neverending game of gasoline roulette. No gas in the car that I had planned to take on a 50 mile round trip into the country! Extra annoyance: Steve had taken the car to the cheap gas side of town yesterday. Couldn't he see that he was running on fumes? He is waiting for the prices to go down. Meanwhile, no gas. I ended up buying it at the last place I found myself gasless in the early morning hours rescuing Josh from that sudden growth on his leg 2 weeks ago.

But instead of taking the expressway, I decided to drive on  those country roads I used to bike on years ago criss-crossed with old German roads named after the original settlers. Lots of golden fields on these gently rolling hills. It was quite pretty and buoyed my spirits. I went by a house that someone plastered with hundreds of CDs that almost blinded me in the sunlight. On one of the roads, I used to bike time trials with the local bicycle club. You are timed as you ride as fast as possible for ten miles. I wasn't bad at it. But all of this was so long ago.

My hair dresser lives out there. I do like her a lot and it was definitely time to deal with my shagginess and roots. My chemo curls had morphed to chemo waves. All of that is gone now. Just straight hair. My hair is now darker but I assume a lot of this color will disappear.

It was almost one when I went for my run. I have little energy in the afternoon and it seemed like I was slogging along forever. Four police cars raced by me while I was still in the neighborhood: what gives? More break-ins. And according to the neighborhood watch lady, crazed raccoons with distemper are roaming the street during the day.

Time just flies on by. A year ago today, I watched the boys as Shanna and Ramy closed on their first house. Just 5 weeks later, Ramy lost his job but as it turns out, it was a blessing in disguise. Today is Miss Tess's 6 month seems like yesterday we were in the hospital in Cambridge, MA.

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