Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Should I stay or should I go...

Her hair is growing in at glacial pace. In some light, it is blonde, in some light it is light brown


Maya is 'so big'. Yeah everyone else's baby could do this earlier but she is finally catching on in her imitative behavior, a major short coming as identified by the powers that be.
It turns out that my 40th high school reunion is in less than 2 weeks, not back in May as I originally thought. My high school class was almost 900 people so obviously I didn't know everyone. There is a Facebook page for the reunion where you can see who is coming. Barely anyone that I knew. My city had a populous east side and a sparsely populated west side. I lived on the westside and hardly anyone from there is coming. I put up a posting Does anyone remember me?


People were nice about it. They seemed to remember me or at least said that if I came, they would be my new friend. On Facebook, I have been using a high school picture of me. One man asked to be my friend and remarked on how well preserved I am. I did tell him that I have aged like everyone else if not worse. The picture I posted was the first picture my father took of me since I was 5. He was a photographer so it wasn't for the shortage of cameras in the house. He said that I was no longer 'photogenic'. Furthermore, it was a good thing that I was 'so smart' because I would not be able to rely on my looks to attract a man to support me. I would need to support myself.

Regardless of my prettiness or lack there of, I had vowed that I would never be dependent on a man. I would always have my own money. I saw how powerless my mother was and did not wish to follow her footsteps. True,  most men aren't as abusive as my father and  I couldn't imagine Steve behaving so badly but it has always been in the back of my mind. At any rate, the boys in high school and college failed to get the memo on my lack of attractiveness and I usually had some male attention. Maybe because of my sparkling personality.

One man is coming that I knew though we were hardly friends. He probably was the brightest boy in the school but was very disdainful of others not so bright. He sat next to me in AP chemistry. Despite his superiority in almost everything, he had failed to grow legs that touched the ground sitting at a normal sized desk. Furthermore he wore loafers that dangled from his feet. For the umpteenth time, he had turned to me to glare at something stupid that I said. I kicked one of his loafers off his foot and it went flying 10 feet away. He glared at me again demanding that I retrieve the shoe immediately. I just smiled.

I went to my 10th and 20th and had fun. I was pregnant with Josh for one and just had Naomi for the other. I wish I had looked my best. I have been trying to lose the weight. Maybe I have lost some more but I am too afraid to find out otherwise.

Today in the excessive heat and humidity that seems to have become the norm here, I ran by a new friend. She said something about it is good to get that 'walk' over with early in the morning. Walk!?! Dear Reader, I was running.

Have to work on that form I guess.

In a few hours, I will meet Don'tae's mom. Should be interesting.

2 comments:

Teri Bernstein said...

Hi, Sue...Here is some irony. This weekend I helped one 1971 SFHS graduate, Sheila Kern, with whom I worked at the UGLi and who is a friend of Katie Pfau Gillette's, to move from Sacramento to Orange County. En route, we visited a high school friend of hers, Sue Hammer nee Goodman (I think). Also...my very good friend Lenny Felder is in your class. I think maybe I should go to your HS reunion...LOL...

Cheryl said...

Sorry Sue, you have me smiling. No matter who we are, or what we achieve in life, we somehow feel the need to revert to that teenager, lacking in confidence or whatever. I often wonder about parents. How they manage to say the things they do and accept no responsibility.
Go. Have a great time.
I am so grateful to you for your help with this lesion.
There is some action thanks to the information. Seems I am leading the oncology department.

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