Thursday, December 17, 2015

When do you throw a game?

part of Glass Beach, Ft. Bragg CA

Carson Mansion, Eureka , CA

Why do I have those photos above? Well I am doing my favorite thing: plotting and planning. In a month, we will take a road trip from San Francisco to Seattle and back. Lots to see between the three states.
Today there was an article about what age do you stop letting your child win at various games, Monopoly was the example. The experts came up with 4. Kids need to learn to lose gracefully, a very hard lesson that many adults haven't mastered. Still one shouldn't put your child in situations that it would be outright impossible to win or they will experience learned helplessness. But after a few losses, the wins feel so much better.
When Josh was 11, we rented a racquet ball court. I did remind him that back in the day, I was fairly good at this but as he thought himself to be a superior athlete, he was sure he would beat me even though he never played before. After volleying for a while, he said it was time for an actual game. Well I won and he was in tears. Josh was not a crier so I was surprised. I told him how unrealistic it was to have expected to beat me but said he was getting better the more we played so how about a rematch. Well he won that but still he was unsatisfied because he thought I threw the game.
For some reason, he was always challenging me to a Scrabble game insisting he would win even though my vocabulary was  much larger. I refused to play but instead played games that he would have a chance at winning.
He in turn, didn't give Naomi much of a break. Even though he was 9 years older and much bigger, he would play hard at basketball. She got better and better in part because of it.
Things are more back to normal. Steve is no longer exiled to another room at night; I started driving yesterday. The girls are becoming more flesh colored though I will get stabbing pains in both of them occasionally and the surgical vest is very uncomfortable. And I am to wear it 24/7 for 4 more weeks though I can buy a less restricting garment now. I am to pick up nothing heavier than 5 lbs, a difficult thing. For instance a gallon of milk weighs 8 lbs.  Every day I walk at least 75 minutes. I have even biked a little meeting my 2000 mile goal for the year.

1 comment:

Elephant's Child said...

Lots of adults haven't learnt to lose gracefully.
I worry sometimes about the tendency to give awards for participation. What happens in the real world.
Glad to hear that you are (slowly) improving, and resuming your normal activities.


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