Sunday, September 10, 2017

Irma and the owl and shingles!

toad lily
my spaghetti squash. Still didn't cook it
my aunt and her view from her summer home
She is my mom's youngest sister. Of the 7 kids, only the oldest, age 96 and the youngest, age 86 are left. As she is closer in age to my mom, I thought I could learn more from her
Cool floor from our lunch place in Metamora Michigan. The younger aunt said the older would be so jealous we went there. The building was built in 1850, old by Michigan standards
Maya and her Great Uncle bonding and dancing with their hats
On my bucket list: to see a live owl in the wild. While biking this morning, I saw the ear tufts and first thought: bobcat! But head was very large. Alas, it was injured. It could fly a bit but it hopped on one leg. I returned about 20 minutes later and it was gone. I am hoping for the best
Maya milking the fake cow
Hannah and pumpkins
Allie. She is a pretty girl
Steve, me, the brother and his wife Like my new pink suede jacket? Will I learn to comb my hair?
The bro and his wife
Josh's family  This farm is on my usual Sunday bike loop though today I didn't go by it. It is extremely popular

It has been a very busy last few days. Where to begin?

Hurricane Irma. Where and when will it hit? My aunt lives most of the time right on the gulf south of Sarasota. She comes to Michigan only in the summer and stays with her son on a beautiful lake about 1.5 hours away from me. She and her daughter, my cousin, are fairly reclusive and it was like pulling teeth to see them. Somehow she didn't find the time to see my other aunt, who lives across state and felt a bit hurt that she was ignored. Could I broker a reunion? It was hard enough to see her and now she is going back early obsessed that everything is destroyed. She wants to reclaim a few things before everything is bulldozed. Initially she just worried about her son on the northeast coast of Florida as initial projections had Irma going up the East Coast. She sent him money to flee to northern Georgia. My age and still needs Mom to bail him out. He is the only cousin I haven't seen since childhood. But projections have changed. His abode will probably be safe but my aunt's is probably destroyed as of a few hours ago.

My step niece lives not far from my aunt on the west coast. At first, with the east coast projection, it looked like she and her partner would be safe. Her mom, my sister-in-law, was with us for the weekend and couldn't help worry. But Irma went up Florida's west coast? will the niece go to safety? They crossed the state and now are on the east coast, which does not sound safe to me. Ironically , lots of the East Coast people took refuge in her town. It is a mess. And with all the firestorms on the west coast with choking ash in the skies and it is not even the usual fire season, Michigan is looking pretty good right now.

I made arrangements to see my cousin and aunt before I knew the New Yorkers, Steve's brother and wife, were coming to town. His wife could only say through the weekend as she still teaches in a yeshiva.

My older aunt, who I saw last month in Holland and saw twice last year is an out going, talkative, sharp woman. But as she was so much older than my mom and out of the house before various issues arose, it was hard to get useful info from her. Ask the younger sister, I was told.

I was mired in construction traffic going there Friday. Should have consulted Julie who works fairly close to where my cousin lives. I do like this cousin quite a bit. she is 2 years younger than me and never has rejected me unlike the cousin on the west coast of Michigan who was so snotty to me when I was a kid (but since has bent over backwards to make up for it). They do not talk though are interested in news of each other as transmitted by me.  Unlike them, I am not shy. I may be socially awkward at times but I am not hesitant to deal with people.  As soon as I got to my cousin's, she offered to drive the 30 minutes north to her mom's, my aunt. Northern Oakland county has several very cute towns, which we went through. My aunt's I would go through on the way to my mom's cousin's dairy farm. Her lakefront home is beautiful. I had made a copy of a photo of her as my mom's bridesmaid that she has never seen (despite me having sent it to her son-in-law's Facebook account) She said she would treasure the photo.  My aunt wanted to go to this historical restaurant that the other aunt loved but had no idea how to get there. Both she and my cousin have no idea how to use a computer but fortunately, I do and quickly found it. It was in a town I went to Girl Scout camp years ago.

What did I learn? Well one of cousins died at age 55 from a 2 month battle with biliary duct cancer just a few years ago. He was a bit younger than my brother and had stayed with us once. My grandfather was a versatile musician and taught violin and piano to the kids and neighbors. My mother had zero talent and did not learn any instrument unlike all her siblings. The uncle close in age to my mom's who killed himself when he was 19 ingesting phenol was a paranoid schizophrenic who was molested as a child. My uncle, a few years back, had shown me his photo and he was exceedingly handsome. This aunt didn't think there was any  photos of him. My other aunt thought my grandmother was the worse mom ever only caring for the babies whereas this aunt thought my grandma was pretty good. Of course she was the youngest. She said my grandmother was a talented seamstress and tailor. One of my uncles was dyslexic so she would read all his work for him, which surprised me as I never thought of my grandmother as particularly educated or bright though she was always very nice to me.  Why did my mom leave home at 16? Severe emotional problems. My aunt thought anxiety but my mom never seemed particularly anxious to me. She had the same high school French teacher as my mom who approached her to say something was terribly wrong with my mom as she refused to ever speak in front of class. My aunt thought my mom left for some special school for children with emotional problems; my mom told me she lived in the Y and worked at Sanders. Who knows the truth? One of this aunt's grandchildren is autistic (with some special talents). Could my mom be autistic? Yes, definitively on the spectrum. She was not close to my mom. My theory is that my mom was the forgotten sibling though one of her brothers made an extra effort to watch out for her as did my older aunt. My younger aunt does appreciate her oldest sister..then why didn't she contact her?

We definitely had an interesting talk and my cousin was glad to her  mom's mind off of fretting over what mess will happen in Florida. I guess it will be next year before I can get them all together.

Shingles. At first Steve had a slight rash looking very much like poison ivy covering only a square inch on his ribs for about a week. But unlike poison ivy, it really hurt instead of just itching. It has since spread along his right side completely covering a rib. It looks ugly and is very painful. He can't sleep and is very grumpy. The only person at risk is Hannah as she isn't vaccinated yet against chicken pox. But pretty much, the contents of his blisters have to come in contact with her. We made sure this didn't happen.

I will continue at some point

5 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

Family can be a minefield can't it? Buried truths are common in ours.
Sigh on the shingles front.
I hope those of your family in Irma's path escape more lightly than is predicted.

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

My son in law was diagnosed with shingles last week. He went right away to the doctor when the rash first appeared. The doctor prescribed medicine and told him that he would be better in a week. I suffered through shingles for six weeks when I got it at age 40 years ago so I guess they must have improved the treatment. I hope your husband is as lucky as my SIL. I remember it as pretty painful and annoying. I hope you have been vaccinated.

Sue in Italia/In the Land Of Cancer said...

SOACM-He hadn't consulted a doctor yet as ours retired very recently. He does have another assigned to him but is not sure he wants o keep him as he is far away. Also the internet said treatment is most effective if started immediately and it took a week for him to realize what he had. But he is in so much pain, he will see they have to say about it. Presumably I am not at any risk because of him. I did have chicken pox. I did not have the shingles vaccine as it is expensive nd not very effective

Sandi said...

I was going to guess that photo in the next post was shingles... :( ugh...glad he is doing better. My hubby had it and had to do eye drops. His was on his head and forehead. Horrible stuff.

I love the Michigan floor-- how cool, and, of course, the view from her window. What part of Michigan is this? I grew up in Lexington, on the thumb.

Nice to "meet" you! I am new to your blog.

Sue in Italia/In the Land Of Cancer said...

Welcome Sandy! The restaurant is the White Horse Inn in Metamora in southern Lapeer county. She lives in Oxford, Oakland County, only in the summer. The aunt pictured here owned a cottage around Forester that had a Palm address so we would go through Lexington to get there

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